Thursday, January 8, 2009

You may have seen me cry, but you never know why.

Unless if you are the person whom I wet your sleeve with my tears.

I had this casual chat with a very respectable man, the Assistant Manager as the place I'm working, and it was a surprised when I found out that he knew things about me. Things as in stuff I never told him or hardly anyone, especially if I just knew that person. Please take note that I am the type of person who can adapt, get use to something or someone easily, but, to get comfortable, to have a sanctuary-like feeling to something or someone, that takes a lot. So, since I am only get use to him, I did't really share my personal stuff with him.

So, how did he find out about my things?

No, he didn't read my blog.
I don't tell much in here anyway. My writings here are more or less in general but it will be personal if you can read between the lines. *grins*

Yes, he sort of asked around. He knew plenty of my schoolmates and asked about me. He told me what he knew and as much as I am surprised, I am also glad since he knew the nice things. There were also some unpleasant things, but I did't mind. Although they weren't pleasant, they were the truth.

He uttered this question "You cried in school because people are not very fond of you. Am I right?". When he asked that, it was as if he was reciting a spell of laughter. And it freakingly works. I laughed instantly after he recited the spell.

Why the hell did I laugh?

Because only a part of that statement was true.

How come?

I cried in school, True. I cried because people are not very fond of me, False.

As said by a dear friend of mine, I am a crybaby. I don't deny that. I do cry. A lot. As abnormal and strange as I am, I cried because I am sad, just like other normal human being. There are multiple of equations that are needed to be implied to make my Formula of Sadness work.

But people are not very fond of me is not a part of the formula.
No, My Formula of Sadness does not involve that equation. Because the level of logic in that equation is very low to be implied in the formula.

The fact is
I don't care if people are not very fond of me.

That equation does not imply to neither of my formula of life.
Formula of Sadness, Formula of Happiness, Formula of Agony, Formula of Pleasure,
non of these formula need the stupid equation make it work.

True I cried.
But if you are not the person who I cried with,
then you don't have even the slightest idea what triggers those tears to fall.

You don't know me unless I want you to know me

2 screams:

deedlebag said...

u can get the snare pad at rm79.90, but depending on the brand. available at music store, of course. cara nak blajar, tengok youtube je (: start with the single stroke. but first, blajar cara pegang stick and ketuk dulu. btw, nice song. the used is my favourite band! (:

C.E.@ said...

respon pasa last sentence: "can i?"