Beepbeep....beepbeep....(sound of phone ringing)
Friend : Yeah?
Sucker : Dude!!
Friend : Sup?
Sucker : Dude I wanna cry!!!
Friend : The hell?? What happened??
Sucker : (moans like hell)
Friend : Cut it out. What happened?
Sucker : I went to send my brother's clothes to grandma's place
Friend : You drove?
Sucker : Yeah.
Friend : I thought your driving test is next week.
Sucker : Uh..yeah..
Friend : sigh..yeah..so??
Sucker : And then..when I got home..I wanted to park the car..and then..
Friend : You got into an accident?
Sucker : .........
Friend : How so?
Sucker : Bang the gate
Friend : Was it bad?
Sucker : Bumper and lights were damaged.
Friend : *giggles*
Sucker : Shut up
Friend : *still giggling*
Sucker : I need you to take me to the bank
Friend : *stop giggling* Mum wants you to pay?
Sucker : No. but it was me who caused the damage. So I ought to be responsible
Friend : Yeah, ok. Be there in about 15 minutes.
Terror, guilt, foolishness, shame left no hole in me after the incident. I was terrified to get outside my room. Afraid. Afraid to face the truth that I screw up. Afraid to face the punishment. But then I couldn't hide forever. My bloody stomach grumbled. Like it or not, I have to go out.
Opened door slowly. Walk slowly towards the fridge. Saw Mama from the corner of the eyes. Took a yogurt and sat in the living room. Watched tv. Then saw Mama walking towards me. Heart beat faster. Blood gets hotter. Was expecting some kind of sharp choking words to kill me from the inside. To tear up the wound of guilt that was growing bigger by the second.
Mama : When's your driving test? (she asked in a casual tone)
Sucker : (felt a bit relieved. but wasn't completely) Uh, somewhere around next week.
Mama : How are you going to pass the test if you can't even get through the gate?? (laughed)
Sucker : hehe..Test is different. This is different Ma.(felt better)
Then mama went back to her laptop. Boy, was I relieved. A few minutes later my friend came. He stopped by a little while to check out the damaged done by me.
Friend : Whoa
Sucker : yeah..whoa
Friend : Phew
Sucker : Lets get to the bank
In the car
Friend : Mama mad at you?
Sucker : *crooked eyebrows.* I'm not sure
Friend : How come?
Sucker : Yeah. I mean, she never really complained. She didn't actually. After I bang the car, all she asked was when is my test and joked about me not passing the test because I couldn't even get through the gate. She didn't even give any look or frown at me.
Friend : ouh..k..
Sucker : So, I'm not sure if she's mad at me.
Friend : My mum would have make it one hell of a big deal.
Sucker : Actually, it is a big deal. That's gonna cost hundreds.
Friend : Yeah. But your mum can act like it was nothing. It's either she's filthy rich or she's just cool.
Sucker : If she's filthy rich I wont feel too bad.
Friend : She's just cool. *grins*
Reached the bank. Took out some money. Yeah, some. Then called Mama asking she was. She said she was at the workshop. So we went there.
At the workshop. Entered this sort of office, where my Mama sat with my uncle across the owner of the workshop I reckon.
Sucker : *entered the office* Hye ma.
Workshop owner : I suppose you are the one who hits the gate.
Everyone laughed. I just smiled.
Sucker : here you go Ma
Mama : What's this?
Sucker : Some cash.
Mama : I know, for what?
Sucker : Bumper and lights.
Quickly walked out of the office and went straight into the car.
Friend : Done?
Sucker : yeah
Friend : Where to next?
Sucker : Dunno
Then saw Mama and uncle coming towards the car.
Mama : Hey. can you please send us home?
Friend : Yeah, sure. No problem.
When we reached home
Sucker : Dude, hold up, want to get some cash.
Mama : Do you have any?
Sucker : Yeah. Left them inside my room.
Mama : *handed me the cash I gave earlier*
Sucker : Nah..I have some more left. You use that for the car.
Mama : Take it. I'll ask some from you if I don't have enough money for the car later.
Sucker : *choking* Yeah, ok Ma. *got into the car*
Was quiet along the way.
Friend : Hey
Sucker : *nods*
Friend : Mama said something?
Sucker : *shook head*
Friend : Then?
Sucker : She return my money.
Friend : Well, that's good. Isn't it.
Sucker : Partly.
Friend : Why?
Sucker : *sigh*
Friend : What is there to be upset about? Mama's not mad, you got your money back. Happy ending, isn't it?
Sucker : This is the greatest guilt I ever bear.
Friend : Mama forgive you. I'm sure she does.
Sucker : It's the greatest guilt because I am pardoned without punishment when it is crystal clear I'm guilty.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Posted by Lily Cartina at 6:59 AM